Marketing / Promotional info on "Oz", to be built adjacent to the BankAtlantic Center:

It's sunrise, and a fresh-baked scone beckons at the French bakery right outside your door. Your coffee is perfect because it is prepared by a local who knows you by name. Just a few feet from your residence is your office, and your commute is a stroll, no bus, no car, no taxi, no train. You will pass friends along the way. They will smile, wave and say hello.

Indeed, nothing says "good living" quite like a scone. And all the smiling and waving sounds like a stroll through labotomy-land. Who wrote this? Richard Simmons?

Alas, it gets better:

Tonight you might take in a show, a Broadway show, or a professional hockey game or concert at the arena just around the corner. Your seats will be just where you like them, thanks to your resident concierge. Late night is every night in Oz, with sidewalk cafes, clubs, restaurants, bistros and even fitness clubs operating on your schedule.

Who doesn't need the option of a 3 a.m. visit to the bistro outside your door? And exactly what is included in the "concierge" service? Are they female?

Bob Norman of the Broward New Times carries this, um, unusual story.