Panthers Ice Dancers need bodies

Saturday marks the preliminary round of auditions for the upcoming season's Ice Dancers squad, to be held at BankAtlantic Center around noon. Well ok, at noon. Still a tad peeved since I Fed Ex'd my application several months ago and have yet to receive so much as an email response. Must've been my 5x7.

Anyway, according to the official site they will take applications right up until the start of the thing, but be mindful of several strict conditions which must be met; for example:

"We strongly recommend that you wear your hair and apply your makeup in a way that compliments your features."

Would love to have been in the room when the copywriter navigated that minefield; well done.

In an obvious tribute to milestone pioneering efforts by Debbie Gibson and Tiffany of two decades ago, the final audition will be held in a mall in Pembroke Pines next Saturday. Our best of luck to all the applicants. And I want my 5x7 returned.